I have always been an admirer of the work done by the Barbie Liberation Organization. They became famous for a culture jamming incident in 1993, in which they swapped the voice boxes from talking GI Joes and Barbies, and placed them back on store shelves to be taken home by unsuspecting consumers. The resulting toys had Barbie yelling phrases such as “Vengeance is Mine!” and “Eat lead, Cobra!”, while the GI Joe dolls would exclaim phrases such as “Let’s Go Shopping!” and “The beach is the place for summer.” They even released a propaganda video, explaining their rationale for their guerrilla war against consumer-driven gender stereotypes, seen below:
About a year ago, I noticed a disparity in marketing for these “rubbing playsets”. They are playsets in which you can swap plates to form a complete picture, then take paper and a crayon to produce a rubbing of the finished piece. The sets in particular were at World Market, and included “Action Plates”, a set of superhero plates (mostly male) that you could use to create action heroes, while the other were “Fashion Plates”, which could be used to create various female fashion models. This just didn’t sit well with me. Why aren’t there fashion plates for young men and boys to connect with? Where are the heroic women? What about those that aren’t covered in such binary, black and white terms?
I asked myself, “What would the Barbie Liberation Organization do?”
I fixed it.
I saw that the sets had gone on clearance, so my window of opportunity was closing. I rushed to snatch them up (driving 45 minutes away to get one of them), and started dumping the parts into a pile, looking at the raw material like some mad scientist. Time to form… The Social Justice League!
Akemi
Superpower: Sowing mutual respect, and banishing mutual fear.
Anthem: Kendrick Lamar – XXX
Akemi may spend her days making repairs at a wind farm, but she spends her off hours volunteering to make a difference. She uses her mechanical and metalworking skills to take guns that have been donated and taken off the street and forge them into garden tools to be donated in a “Swords to Plowshares” benefit. She’s also kills it behind a drum kit.
Malgorzata
Superpower: Can Transform Willful Ignorance to Empathy
Anthem: Jamiroquai – When You Gonna Learn?
Malgorzata has climbed mountains from the Pyrenees to the Himlayas, the Alps to the Sierras, all to better assess the damage humans have done to their environment, specifically atmospheric Ozone depletion and Global Warming. She also knows how to find the best mushrooms in the wild, and grows her own eggs from her hens, Clotho, Atropos, and Lachesis.
Ekon
Superpower: Educating others on the boundless intelligence and emotional capacity of the animal kingdom.
Anthem: Goldfinger – Free Me
Ekon works in Wildlife Conservation, and speaks at schools on respecting our animal brethren and the threats put forth by man against them. She speaks out against wild animals as pets, entertainment animals, and animal testing. She also writes a popular blog on bodily autonomy, and the need to keeps legislation out of our bodies. She has a weakness for Kimchi, pickled okra, Olives, and pickles.
Maria
Superpower: Showing people that anything is possible.
Anthem: Five Knives – All Fall Down
Maria didn’t let a little thing like “life” get in her way, and fought her way from a childhood accident to be a paralympic skating athlete, with dreams to be a jammer in her local Montreal derby league. She’s a very vocal supporter of socialized medicine, knowing that she wouldn’t be able to make ends meet in America with the costs of treatment and physical therapy. She has a Great Dane named Pequeño, and her Derby Name is “Para-Nutz”.
Dawn
Superpower: Changing the World
Anthem: David Bowie – Space Oddity
After a childhood of curiosity and libraries, Dawn was awarded a STEM scholarship for biology and nutritional science. Her desire for space exploration led her to work for NASA, pioneering vegan protein replacements that can take us to Mars and beyond, removing the need for animal-based agriculture and saving essential resources for travel. She still plays her 16th Level Paladin with her college friends, and she can name the wood and age of any bourbon with only her nose.
I didn’t feel like making any villains right now, but I’m sure you can imagine them:
“Doctor Not-All-Men”
“Baroness All-Lives-Matter”
The Twin Robots, “Thoughts” and “Prayers”
“Count No-Consensus”
“President Grab-Em-By-The”
And, “The Nice Guy”.
On second thought, we don’t have to imagine them, because between AOC, RBG, and every one of us, we have the superpowers to defeat the villains of this world. Sounds like time for the Social Justice League to come to the rescue!
I wonder if Liberated Barbie would like to join up?